Lying Ex Scammed Me for Sperm – a New York man is suing his ex for leaving him under less-than-flattering circumstances. " He found out their love was a lie after the pregnant [ex] came back from a 10-day bicycle trip in Arizona and told him 'she had met someone else that could make her cervix orgasmic just by thinking and that [he] was sexually inadequate.'"
I have to say, if this "Guy Compton" really exists, he must be quite the cocksman. New PatRoW rule: anytime a newspaper prints the words " psychically sexually satisfying cycle stud", I will run that story. Even if said newspaper is the NY Post.
Britney Spears' dentist emergency – I like how Britney was whining about how "unfair" life was that she chipped a tooth and wasn't allowed to take painkillers. Boo hoo – I'm a 25-year-old over the hill addict. Feel sorry for me. Pay attention to me. Close your eyes and try to remember what I looked like when I was 17.
Jacko to Erect 50ft Robot Replica of Himself – do you think Michael Jackson is sitting over in Dubai, fondling some young orphans and distraught over the Britneys and Anna Nicoles of the world who are making people forget how bizarre he is? And do you think he says, "Hey – what can I do to remind people that I'm the weirdest guy in the world?"
"Hazaa! I'll erect a 50-foot tall robot replica of myself in the Las Vegas desert! And it will shoot out lasers! And it will help me bang more 12-year-old boys!"
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